Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
