Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
