you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
