do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
