okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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