Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
