Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
i think i scared a bird with my dick
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
