ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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