my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Randomize
