a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
He did a backflip because drugs
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize