I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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