That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
