Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
