they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Randomize
