I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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