Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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