kristin has been a bad kristin
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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