okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
