Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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