I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
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