just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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