Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize