There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
