obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
