GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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