But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
