Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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