Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
