i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
