I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
She's better-looking with the mask on.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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