I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
