I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
