Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
