i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
