i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
