My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
