S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
