i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
