So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
