you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Your dad touched me again.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
