When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
