Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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