I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
