dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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