you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
