Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
