is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize
