can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
