Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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