He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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